Where are you? Really! Where are you? This
article is not for someone else… Not your husband. Not your
mother. Not your best girlfriend. Not your Sunday School.
Not your support group. Yes, it is JUST for you!
Woman-to-woman. From my heart to yours! Why? Well, as a
woman, I hate to confess, but I see that we, as women, have
a very strong tendency to get so wrapped up in all that we
are to do each and every day—growing in godliness, nurturing
our marriages, ministering to the hearts of our children,
homemaking, ministering to those in our sphere of influence,
homeschooling, working—that we FORGET to make every effort
enjoy the journey! We get too busy to take those long
walks...to snuggle up with great books...for an afternoon at
the park--just playing together...for a game filled with
giggles. Life goes by...and the word enjoy is the last word
that we could use to describe our days. Although this is our
tendency, I have good news! In John 10:10 we read the words
of Jesus, “I am come that they might have life, and that
they might have it MORE ABUNDANTLY.” The Amplified Version
says, “I came that they may have and ENJOY life, and have it
in abundance (to the full, till it overflows.)” Beloved,
Jesus came, gave His whole life, not JUST to save your soul
from eternity in Hell. He came with the purpose of giving us
the gift of LIFE now, life more abundant! His plan is for us
to seize each moment and enjoy every single bit of life! Is
this the description of your life today? Are you able to
seize each day for all of the blessings that it holds for
you? Are you even enjoying what you are doing? Are you doing
all of the "right" things--baking homemade bread, making
babies, wearing blue-jean dress jumpers, sewing all of your
family’s clothing, teaching the Bible at each service in
your church--everything, yet coming up a bit frayed, tired,
and empty? Read this letter from a beloved subscriber to my
Homeschooling the Easy Way magazine… “Please enter my
subscription to HTEW. A friend forwarded hers to me...what a
blessing! I have just begun my 13th year of homeschooling my
oldest two sons, ages 17 and 15 1/2. I am also starting with
our two daughters, ages 6 and 4 1/2 and have two toddler
boys, 2 1/2 and 17 months. The youngest four were added to
our family through adoption as newborns. When I read the
part about your trip to Bath and Body Works, when your
husband wouldn’t let you buy anything for anyone but
yourself, I started crying. I felt so silly sitting at my
computer crying! But, you touched a place in my heart I
guess, and I realized that I have felt so poured out, so
emptied, for SOOO long. I have failed to allow Jesus to
refill me, I have failed to allow others to minister to me,
and I have tried to push forward day after day after day
even past the point of physical, emotional, mental, and
spiritual exhaustion. There have been some tough times in
our life over the last year or two and it has taken a toll.
I KNOW everything you mention, but I fail to put it into
practice. After reading this, I plan to start. Thank you so
much for being honest and for encouraging me to let Jesus
have everything. I want to live in the freedom that only
comes from abiding in Him. Your Sister In Christ.” How about
you? Tough times? Poured out? Empty? Exhausted? I am
absolutely sure that you feel like me. You say, “YES!! YES!!
YES!!...But, oh, it is OK, because I love my family. I love
my church. I love my friends.” Beloved, this is exactly
where I am coming from. God created a GOOD thing when He
created women. There is nothing like the unending commitment
of a woman or the preciousness of a mother “mothering.”
Chicken soup can fix anything when it is lovingly made by
Mama. Boo-boo’s are instantly healed with the gentle touch
and compassion of Mommy. No one can make cookies like Mama.
We love mothers. We love mothering! I certainly do not want
to ere on the side of feminism, but perhaps that is just the
point. We have so reacted to the ideas of feminism that we
often fail to let anyone close enough to mother and minister
to us. We want to be godly. In doing so, we pour out to the
point of personal starvation. From the world’s eye, we have
it all under control. We balance all of the demands quite
beautifully, yet it is all a lie. Yes. It is a big lie. A
lie that is hurting all of the women who watch us from a
distance, while beating themselves up for not being
productive enough, together enough, strong enough. I am
coming to you woman-to-woman at the time that no one else
has to see your tears. No one else has to even know that you
are tired and weary. No one else has to know about your
exhaustion. My dear one, take a moment to get
bone-deep-honest. Give me all that you have! Honestly, how
long has it been since you have really “let” others minister
to and mother you? How long has it been since you have sat
at the feet of Jesus until He was overflowing on you. Oh! I
know ALLLLLL of the excuses. I have used them far too many
times myself... “I am TOO busy! I HAVE to…” “If I don’t do
it, nobody else will…” “They asked ME so it must be God’s
will…” “I have gifts for….” “How else will the WORLD learn
about God???” “I have died to MYSELF” We all have our
excuses. As a result, we grow steadily more and more
weary…more exhausted…more frustrated… starving for joy… more
parched…more lonely…needing satisfaction…looking for
direction. How about you? Do you know that you know that you
KNOW your calling, but deep down you find yourself a bit
tired of the push and pull? Wondering if what you are doing
is really making difference? Are you finding yourself in a
desert? A wilderness? Needing rest? Broken? In ruins? In
Famine? Lonely? Parched? Needing Revival? Hungry for joy?
Looking for direction? Needing satisfaction? Any of these
describe you? They have all described me at many of my
weakest moments. Know those moments? When the whole world
goes on while the crisis pounds away? When no one seemed to
know OR care? Oh, yes…I have been there, but of course, as
the queen of mommy martyrs, I would never have told anyone
or asked for any help. HELLO! Anybody relate? Inevitably
there is someone that this article is FOR YOU at this very
moment. Although you enjoy and derive your greatest
blessings from pouring your life out to those within your
sphere of influence, you may wonder if what you are doing
amounts to anything. You may be pouring out each and every
day while your sacrifices receive very little if any
appreciation. In fact, you may have adversity the whole time
you are doing what you are called to do. Want encouragement
as you enjoy the journey? Take a look at Jeremiah 31: 1-22,
25 (especially verses 16-22, 25) FIND THE WAY! This passage
is key to enjoying the journey! If you are going to really
enjoy the journey, God wants for you to know that what you
are doing is exactly what He wants for you to do. He wants
for you to know…really know that your work will be rewarded.
Those seeds that you are sowing will reap a bountiful
harvest. KNOW that there is hope for your future. The
enemy’s strategy is to convince you that there is no hope.
If he can take your hope, he can work destruction in your
life. KNOW that even in the darkest moment, there is hope.
The morning will come and joy comes in the morning! Made
mistakes? Feel that your mistakes are beyond repair? Broken
to the point that you cannot see any hope? God will restore
you. God will restore your circumstances. God will restore
all that you have lost along the way! Burdened? Tired?
Weary? God will take away that yoke that is too hard for you
to carry. What does it take? Go back to this passage for
God’s answers...Return. Repent. Know that you are a darling
child and beloved. He remembers you. Know that God yearns
for you. God has great compassion—mercy, pity, and
loving-kindness— for you. So, what are you to do today? Take
a look at verses 21-22… “Set up for yourselves highway
markers [back to Canaan], make for yourselves guideposts;
turn your thoughts and attention to the way by which you
went [into exile]. Retrace your steps, O Virgin Israel,
return to these your cities. How long will you waver and
hesitate [to return] O you backsliding daughter? For the
Lord has created a new thing in the land [of Israel]; a
female shall compass (woo, win, and protect) a man.” Look
further down to verse 25… “For I will fully satisfy the
weary soul, and I will replenish every languishing and
sorrowful person.” Set up road signs, put up guideposts.
Take note of the highway you took. Return. Stop wandering.
Then! God will refresh you! God will bring that satisfaction
you so desperately need. You will be ready to plant, ready
to build (verse 28). Jeremiah 6: 16 also talks about the WAY
that we go, the roads...the paths in our lives... “Thus
saith the Lord: Stand by the roads and look; and ask for the
eternal paths, where the good, old way is; then walk in it,
and you will find rest for your souls.” Want to enjoy the
journey? Take the time along the way to stand, look, and ask
for the OLD PATHS. Our culture has gotten off the old paths.
Even though many SEE the good, old way; few will walk in it.
As godly women, we must search for it, seek for it. God, is
our Good Shepherd. He will lead us in the good old paths. He
will guide us to the way that brings rest! Want to enjoy the
journey? Stand. Look. Ask for the old paths, the good old
way. Then walk in it! SURRENDER TO HIS WORK IN YOUR LIFE...
Easier said than done? Oh, yes! Our flesh gets in the way!
We want to go our way, with our ideas, making ourselves feel
good. Of course, instead of joy, we find strife, pain, and
brokenness as we cater to SELF! If we are ever to enjoy the
journey, we must daily bring self to the cross in surrender.
The path of self is a path of destruction. Oh, self can even
seem godly at times. A while back I remember hearing a truth
that brought more freedom to me as it demanded that I truly
evaluate all that I do, not by my eyes, but through God’s.
It was said that if satan cannot get us to do the “bad”
things, then he will settle for getting us busy doing good
things rather than the best things that God has called us to
do. Blatant sin may never get us, but we are far from free
of temptation. The “good” things are so much more alluring.
They keep us too busy to ever get around to doing the very
best things that we are designed to do. If we want to enjoy
the journey, we must become that vessel that God can use. We
must to surrender to His work in our lives and His work for
our lives. Oh, this is not easy! In fact, this is exactly
where so many of us take side roads in our journey. This
reminds me of the story of a tea cup…
NOT YET... Unknown…Slightly changed by ME!
There was a couple who used to go to England to shop in the
beautiful stores. This was their 25th wedding anniversary.
They both liked antiques and pottery and especially teacups.
On this special day, they saw the most gorgeous teacup they
had ever seen. They asked the store clerk, “May we see that
one? We’ve never seen one quite so beautiful.” As the lady
handed it to them, suddenly the teacup spoke! “You don’t
understand,” it said. “I have not always been a tea cup. I
have QUITE a story! You see I was once just a blob of red
clay. My master took me…rolled me…patted me…over and over
and over. It hurt SO bad! I yelled out, ‘Stop! Let me
alone!’ But he only smiled, ‘NOT YET.’” “Then I was placed
on a spinning wheel,” the teacup said, “and suddenly I was
spun around and around and around. ‘Stop it! I am getting
dizzy!’ I screamed. But the master only nodded and said,
‘NOT YET.’” “Then he put me in the oven. I never felt such
heat. I wondered why he wanted to burn me, why he would not
stop this! I yelled and knocked at the door. I could only
see him through the opening as he shook his head and I read
his lips saying, ‘NOT YET.’” “Finally the door was opened.
He took me out of the oven and put me on a shelf to cool.
‘There…that’s better,’ I said. And…then…he all the sudden
began to brush and paint me all over. The fumes were
horrible! I thought I would gag! ‘Stop it! Stop it! Stop
it!’ I cried! He only nodded and said once again, ‘NOT
YET.’” “Then, suddenly he put me back in the oven. Only not
like the first one. This oven was twice as hot! I just KNEW
I would suffocate! I begged. I pleaded. I screamed. I cried.
All the time I could see him through the opening nodding his
head, saying, ‘NOT YET.’” “I knew there was no hope. I would
never make it now. I was ready to give up. But at that very
moment the door opened and he took me out and placed me on
the shelf. One hour later, he handed me a mirror and said,
‘Look at yourself.’ And I did. I said, ‘That’s not me! That
could not be me! It’s beautiful! I…I AM beautiful!’” “Then
he said, ‘I want you to remember that I know it hurt to be
rolled and patted, but if I had just left you, you would
have dried up. I know it made you dizzy to spin around on
the wheel, but if I had stopped, you would have crumbled. I
know it hurt and it was hot and disagreeable in the oven,
but if I hadn’t put you there, you would have cracked. I
know the fumes were bad when I brushed and painted you all
over, but if I had not done that you never would have
hardened OR had any color in your life. If I had not put you
back into that second oven, you would never have been able
to survive very long because the hardness would not have
held. NOW, you are a finished product. You are what I had in
mind for you when I first began!’”
Relate? My tendency has always been to pull
away from the very things that are shaping me. If I never
went through the fire, I would be happy. I simply detest
change. I cannot stand letting go of things that have become
a part of my life. The hardest struggles that I have moved
through are simply my will colliding with God’s perfect plan
for my life. However, as I look back, my testimony is much
like the tea cup’s story. Oh, it is all so much better. I
really do not miss those things that I laid down. In fact,
all is so much better, that I cannot believe I was not more
willing and surrendered. Beloved, know that as you surrender
to the work God wants to do in and through your life, all is
working to prepare you to become that vessel that He can use
mightily. It may mean that those things that are very good,
may actually be just the things hindering us from enjoying
the journey. RE-FILL YOUR CUP! Now, again…this is another
area that will make a difference in whether we do or do not
enjoy the journey. Romans 2: 21 gets a little too personal
if you ask me, “Thou therefore, which teachest another,
TEACHEST THOU NOT THYSELF?” Oops! What good Christian woman
wants to be accountable to this passage? Isn’t it “godly” to
lay down your life for others? Lay down your life until
DEATH…even death on a cross??? Would they ASK us to
teach...or bake goodies...or sing in the choir IF we were
not ABLE to do ALL things??? Ok, buckle up…this is going to
be hard! We have nothing to pour forth without lifting up
our cup for a daily filling. Oh, don’t take just this verse
as a challenge, take a look back in Scripture to the book of
Exodus. Do you remember the provisions for manna, that daily
food in the wilderness? Take a look as a refresher: Manna
was to be gathered each and every day. Manna was to be
gathered first for the person, then for those within their
tent, and then for those outside of their tent. Only enough
manna for that day was to be gathered. (It would mould by
the next day!) In the heat, more manna had to be gathered
because it would melt in the heat! Now, think about our
tendencies. Our tendency is to give to the church and the
world…then, if there is anything left over we give to our
family…then, any remnants are left for ourselves. We think
of ourselves as invincible, only "gourging" at a revival
once a year and snacking on God each week during church. We
starve ourselves and wonder where JOY could be hiding. If we
want to enjoy the journey, we must submit to God’s way of
ministering to others. Otherwise, we will not only find
ourselves wiped out on a regular basis, but we will not be
able to stay the course for the duration of the journey. How
do we fill our cup back up? First, we have to sit at the
feet of Jesus. Remember Mary in Luke 10: 38-42? She sat when
the temptation was there to get distracted, busy, anxious,
and troubled. Not only did she sit at the feet of Jesus, but
she also listened to His teaching. Listening is
life-changing. Listening prepares us to become that vessel
that God can use. Listening fills us up so we can pour forth
to those that God brings our way.
Second, we must answer to Jesus’ call. Matthew 11: 28-30
says… “Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden and
overburdened, and I will cause you to rest, [I will ease and
relieve and refresh your souls.] Take my yoke upon you and
learn of me, for I am gentle (meek) and humble (lowly) in
heart, and you will find rest (relief and ease and
refreshment and recreation and blessed quiet) for your
souls. For my yoke is wholesome (useful, good—not harsh,
hard, sharp, or pressing, but comfortable, gracious, and
pleasant), and My burden is light and easy to be borne.”
Matthew 11: 28-30 (Amplified Bible) If we want to be full to
overflowing, we are only a breath away from the Source of
our Living Water. He cries out for us to come to Him, learn
of Him, take on His yoke, and find His way. He will refill
us. He will renew us. He will do the work of renewing our
heart, soul, and mind. He will gently bring us to the point
that His commitments become our commitments. He will give us
a heart for biblical womanhood. He will pour into us so we
can pour into others from the overflow. POUR FORTH… If we
were in the Holy Land, we could go walking along side of the
Sea of Galilee, following it into the Jordan River, and that
on down to the Dead Sea. The most interesting thing is that
while there is life in abundance in the Sea of Galilee and
all along the Jordan River, the Dead Sea contains no life.
In fact, all life placed in it soon dies. As I have pondered
this, I have naturally gone back to my tea-cup analogies. I
can just imagine your face if we were sitting down to tea
and I pulled out a beautiful tea cup that had been used
day-after-day-after-day with re-fills, but no pouring forth.
Just try your hand at this one. Gagging already? No one
wants to drink from a dirty vessel…an empty vessel…or
chipped vessel…or a full vessel that has tea from last week
still in it. The Dead Sea does not pour forth. One of the
most interesting facts about the Dead Sea is that it is
mostly sodium. AKA SALT! A little bit of salt is fine, but a
sea full of it cannot sustain life. Notice the name DEAD
SEA??? We can be filled to overflowing with the Word of God,
but unless we are willing to be used by Him as a vessel to
pour forth, we are just as ineffective as an unused tea cup
or the Dead Sea.
Want to enjoy the journey? Pour forth! Don’t
keep God ALL to yourself! Share! POUR FORTH INTO YOUR
FAMILY! Isaiah 54 has the key for anyone wanting a ministry
to our world. It is simple, but it is to ”enlarge the place
of your tent.” Pour first at home. POUR INTO YOUR HUSBAND.
He is your first and greatest ministry. Take care of him and
you will find the rest of your life falling into place…your
schedule, your relationship with your children, your outside
activities, etc. POUR INTO YOUR CHILDREN. It has been said
that if you minister to the whole world, you may be
remembered by your name. However, if you minister to the
whole world and neglect your children, they will never
forget your name OR what you have done. Oh, this is not a
real great legacy. Far too many of us can remember our
parents shortcomings while barely even knowing our parents.
God’s plan, that plan that will underguird and strengthen us
for the duration of the journey, is for us to pour forth
into the lives of our families. He plans for us to pour into
our family with all that we have. All that is excess flows
to those that look into the family, not pouring into the
world while leaving leftovers for our family. Jesus
ministered to the multitudes, yet only discipled a select
few. We are called to the same call of discipleship. As we
disciple our little ones, we can then minister to others as
a family. Trust me, I have tried ministry as a lone-ranger
and I have tried ministry with my family. The only way I can
endure, much less enjoy the journey, is by combining our
gifts, talents, and interests together for an effective
ministry. POUR INTO YOUR HOME. Make your home a home! A
shelter! A place of refuge! The key to your home is in your
hand. Either you can build your home or you can tear it to
pieces with your own hands. Cherish this time! Each and
every moment! Make your home a place of sweet memories.
Really evaluate what you are doing each day to see if it is
eternal. How? Ask yourself the question, “IF this were the
last day I had with my family, would I spend it like this?
Would I read this book? Would I teach this lesson?” If it
doesn’t match up, then let it go. Life is just too short.
The things that we do should underguird what we are training
into our children, not undermine our values. Take that time
today for a good read aloud. Make time in your day for a
game and giggles! Steal away for an afternoon at the park to
JUST play! Learn together. Sit back and listen to those
children as they share what they are learning...you might
just get a new area of interest yourself! Talk together
about their lessons. Minister together. Do the little things
for others. Make the most of today to pour out all you have
into the lives of those that will carry on the legacy after
you.
SO, WHAT DO YOU THINK?
So, what do you think? Right now where you
are…what do you think? How are you doing? Really? I pray
that you will take this moment to really think through what
you are doing and why you are doing it. I pray that you will
take a look at how you are doing along the way. I find
something within me that seems to naturally get so wrapped
up in marriage, mothering, mentoring, homeschooling, and all
of the other things that I DO that I forget to live and
enjoy those closest to me. All of the pain that Jesus went
through on my behalf goes down the drain because I get so
wrapped up in doing that I forget to really enjoy life, much
less experience abundant life! I am not the only one here.
As I finished out this past year on the road, I shared my
heart with many of you only to find that this is right where
you are as well. It just seems more “godly” to give, do, and
work. We do what we do until it becomes monotonous, just a
duty. We are at home in body, but our heart and mind is far,
far away. I hate to say it but, much of what we do, we do
and we have absolutely no idea why we are even doing it. We
just assume that it is the only right thing to do. My
challenge to you, dear friend, is to take a good look at all
of the paths before you. Take a look at those that simply
lead to bondage. Take a look at those that lead to struggle
and heavy burdens. Take a look at those that bring renewal
and refreshment. Take a look at those that lead to life,
abundant life. Find those paths that will bring you to
surrender, renewal, and eventually a ministry of pouring
forth. So, ready? The paths are there before you…will you
enjoy the journey?