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...Wear
Sunscreen
[somehow, listening
and reading the lyrics is more inspiring! ---ps]
Turn on your
speakers...
Listen HERE
Ladies and Gentlemen of
the class of ’99:
If I could offer you only one tip for the future,
sunscreen would be it: The long term benefits of
sunscreen have been proved by scientists whereas the
rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own
meandering experience…I will dispense this advice now.
Enjoy the power and beauty of your
youth; oh never mind; you will not understand the power
and beauty of your youth until they have faded.
But trust me, in 20 years you’ll look back at photos of
yourself and recall in a way you can’t grasp now how
much possibility lay before you and how fabulous you
really looked…
You’re not as fat as you imagine.
Don’t worry about the future; or worry, but know that
worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra
equation by chewing bubblegum.
The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that
never crossed your worried mind; the kind that blindside
you at 4pm on some idle Tuesday.
Do one thing everyday that scares you.
Sing.
Don’t be reckless with other people’s hearts, don’t put
up with people who are reckless with yours.
Floss.
Don’t waste your time on jealousy; sometimes you’re
ahead, sometimes you’re behind…the race is long, and in
the end, it’s only with yourself.
Remember the compliments you receive, forget the
insults; if you succeed in doing this, tell me how.
Keep your old love letters, throw away your old bank
statements.
Stretch.
Don’t feel guilty if you don’t know what you want to do
with your life…the most interesting people I know didn’t
know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives, some
of the most interesting 40 year
olds I know still don’t.
Get plenty of calcium.
Be kind to your knees, you’ll miss them when they’re
gone.
Maybe you’ll marry, maybe you won’t, maybe you’ll have
children, maybe you won’t, maybe you’ll divorce at 40,
maybe you’ll dance the funky chicken on your 75th
wedding anniversary…what ever you do, don’t
congratulate yourself too much or berate yourself either
– your choices are half chance, so are everybody else’s.
Enjoy your body, use it every way you can…don’t be
afraid of it, or what other people think of it, it’s the
greatest instrument you’ll ever own...
Dance…
even if you have nowhere to do it but in your own living
room.
Read the directions, even if you don’t follow
them.
Do NOT read beauty magazines, they will only make you
feel ugly.
Get to know your parents, you never know when
they’ll be gone for good.
Be nice to your siblings; they are the best link to your
past and the people most likely to stick with you in the
future.
Understand that friends come and go, but for the
precious few you should hold on. Work hard to bridge the
gaps in geography and lifestyle because the older you
get, the more you need the people you knew when you were
young.
Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes
you hard; live in Northern California once, but leave
before it makes you soft.
Travel.
Accept certain inalienable truths,
prices will rise, politicians will philander, you too
will get old, and when you do you’ll fantasize that when
you were young prices were reasonable, politicians were
noble and children respected their elders.
Respect your elders.
Don’t expect anyone else to support you.
Maybe you have a trust fund, maybe you have a wealthy
spouse;
but you never know
when either one
might run
out.
Don’t mess too much with your hair, or by the time
you're 40, it will look 85.
Be careful whose advice you buy, but, be patient with
those who supply it.
Advice is a form of nostalgia, dispensing it is a way of
fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off,
painting over the ugly parts and recycling it for more
than it’s worth.
But trust me on the sunscreen…
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